recalibrating the course.
if it is at all possible, I think I am an extroverted introvert. :)quiet is desperately good for my soul and something I crave on a regular basis.2013 left me with an overwhelming desire to need and seek out this quiet.that song that I mentioned earlier is still on repeat in my heart..."find rest, oh my soul... find rest, in Him alone."negative fifteen degree weather in a house filled with beautifully uncomplicated people who love mewas the perfect ending to 2013...and was the perfect place to find rest for my soul.in my journey to find rest...I wrote down a few things I learned while on my end of the year vacation.:)
1. reading/watching quality cinematography is good for my soul.
if you have not read it yet, I cannot recommend The Traveler's Gift high enough. (thank you, neil.) :)it is changing the way I look at life.what I value...what I seek out.it's just really stupid good. :)some of my highlights so far:"seek wisdom. seek wisdom. (I love how he repeats it.) wisdom waits to be gathered. she cannot be bartered or sold. she is a gift for the diligent. and only the diligent will find her. the lazy man - the stupid man - never even looks. though wisdom is available to many, she is found by few.""guard your associations carefully. anytime you tolerate mediocrity in your choice of companions, you become more comfortable with mediocrity in your own life. if a lazy man isn't an irritation to you, it is a sign that you have accepted slothfulness as a way of life.""I will choose to associate with people whose lives and lifestyles I admire. If I associate with chickens, I will learn to scratch at the ground and squabble over crumbs. if I associate with eagles, I will learn to soar to great heights.""it is never the duty of a leader to struggle for someone else; a leader must encourage others to struggle and assure them that the struggles are worthwhile.""we are fighting for each other because it is the right thing to do.""this one thing I do...I press toward the mark."this book (I am only a third of the way through and have highlighted a ridiculous amount already.) is chock full of life changing encouraging words that I'm going to be taking a while to chew on.
2. God is greater, more gracious, and bigger than I can ever hope to imagine or understand.
andHelovesme.and what's even more than that?this perfect, large and incredible God uses His Son to bridge the gap from me to Him and forgives my shortcomings on an hourly basis.I am a foolish woman to live in a way the forgets that incredible grace shown to me.a part from living a life to glorify this great and big God is pointless wandering.Tim talked about this before I left in church...there is worship of this big God to be had in the mundane...it should affect everything I look at,everything I touch,every word I utter,everything.carpe diem soli deo gloria.seize the day, all to the glory of God.enjoy, love, live...appreciate, talk about what you enjoy, who you love, what you are busy about living at...when you take pleasure in what He has made, knowing it is a gift from Him,He gets the glory.do what you do, however small it is, for the glory of Him.everything matters.
3. sympathetic resonance.
"Sympathetic resonance is a harmonic phenomenon wherein a formerly passive string or vibratory body responds to external vibrations to which it has a harmonic likeness."If you play a loud strong E chord on an acoustic guitar in a room full of acoustic guitars hanging on the walls,they will resonate softly with the lead guitar strummed in sympathetic resonance in perfect harmonic unison.how crazy cool is that?I can't help but relate that harmonic unison to my own personal friendships and relationships...the ones that are true and good are the ones who are in harmonic likeness.in the loss of my friend this past month that his loss seems to permeate everything around me,this sympathetic resonance has been glaringly and beautifully apparent...I have been prayed over, been given hand written notes, been hugged more, been messaged, been encouraged,been loved on by those who feel and resonate the way I do.this life's road is so very long and yet so very short,and I am blessed to have deep relationships that not only resonate this side of heaven, but for all of eternity.
4. there is much to be praised in the simple and in the faithful.
my mother-in-law is one of the most simple and faithful people I think I will ever meet this side of heaven.I often ask my husband why he married me...I know myself well enough to know that I am simply nothing like her.and as a younger woman I used to feel the need to chase after things that were unique to me for no other reason than wanting to be independent and "unique".I'm realizing now that that was and is quite foolish.after listening to a conversation some of my family was having over vacation about some young men discovering "new theology" to mold their lives after declaring their elders who have gone before them to be in error...those young men struck me as incredibly foolish.are these young men so arrogant to assume that the great men that have gone before them simply weren't enlightened to the "real truth"?that their years of study and prayer and seeking were in error and that the new theology was the right way?it left a bad taste in my mouth because I saw and see myself in those "new theologians"...there is beauty in my mother-in-law's way of doing life that I can only hope to understand and mold my life after.she is faithful.she is hardworking.she is kind.she is compassionate.she is wise.she is simple.is she perfect?no, but there are qualities in her that I need to glean and mold my life around.I don't need to be quite so unique as I once thought...there is good to be had in the simple and the faithful.a favorite line from a favorite movie perfectly explains how I think of her:"some believe that it is only great power that holds evil in check, but that is not what I have found... I found that it is in the small things. every day deeds done by ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay."
5. my soul thrives in nature.
negative temperatures, ridiculous amounts of snow and yet still I feel the need to seek out solitude...to close my eyes, to raise my head and simplybe still.I will always crave those moments that are just between me and Him.where I feel Him in my soul.where I know He moves the pine tree's for me...where I know He allows me to hear and see a soaring hawk...where I know He painted a sunset for my eyes to drink in...where I know in my soul that He is big and I am small.
6. my husband is my absolute greatest and best friend I can ever hope to have this side of heaven.
stomach flu, frigid temperatures, sleeping in a strange bed where I'm fairly certain the sheets hadn't been changed in over a month by other strangers, warming my cold toes, making me laugh until I cry laughing at the overwhelmingly absurdity of it all and LOVING every minute of it simply because we were together.I don't know if other marriages are like ours...do I still get ridiculously angry and stubborn and disrespectful? yup.do I test his patience to the breaking point? yup.does he test mine? yup.but he chooses to love me everyday...and I choose the same.he chooses to encourage me to live a life glorifying Him...and he is content to live and love in the wake of Him...and oh my gosh, do I love getting to do life with him.his name means "gift from God" and he lives it to the fullest in my life.he is my absolute greatest and best friend...Mr. Whitman's words ring true when it comes to him:"we were together...I forget the rest." :)to end my rambling thoughts and begin my 2014 (which for me officially started yesterday...not the 1st) ;)my friend posted this as I collected the end of my soul-searching thoughts and I loved it:"Resolutions give reflective clarity. They do not define failure or success... rather, they give a momentary or sustaining recalibration to our course."so this is me...recalibrating my course.happy new year to you...I anticipate and wonder at what He will bring my path to in 2014.